Friday, January 11, 2013

My Christian Faith: Part I (My Story)

I have no intentions on boring you with my memoirs or an auto-biography; I just want to give an idea of the type of life I have lived, the trials I have endured bringing me to find Christ. I'm also not going to say I have lived a horrible life because I didn't, but while going through the situation you may feel like it is the most awful thing imaginable.

I do not remember too much until I was probably around 5 or 6 living in Vista, New York. I lived with my parents and younger brother, Robert. After my grandfather passed, my grandmother (Nanny) came to stay with us also. Eventually we moved from Vista to Pound Ridge into my grandmothers old home when I was about 9 (1982 or so). Now by that year, it was pretty much unheard of; at least in Westchester, New York for a home to not have what most would consider simple necessities. I'm speaking of running water, bathrooms, and heat especially. Well, our home had none of them.

We got our water from an outside well house where you took a bucket attached to a chain and lowered it into a well (hole) in the ground and pulled up the water. Honestly it tasted great but washing dishes and taking a bath was not easy. We had to heat the water on the stove and fill basins to wash and rinse dishes and take sponge baths. The bathroom consisted of a commode behind a shower curtain, and heat came from kerosene heaters.

Any idea how much ridicule you get from other kids at school and on the school bus that happen to know about your living situation? Play dates, what? Thankfully we had neighbors that moved in with two girls (Brenda & Donna) my age and a younger sister (Michelle). We all became the best of friends, and still are to this day. Now besides the living situation, I was always on the heavy side. At that time school bullying was pretty bad when it came to kids that were not the norm for weight or happen to be on the poor side. I suffered bullying from nursery school through I think 9th grade when I finally decided to start sticking up for myself.

High school was much better. I had my first boyfriend in 9th grade, the relationship only lasted about 2 months or so, I wasn't ready for anything serious yet. Sorry Kenyon, I didn't mean to hurt you without an explanation. Tenth grade, school was good considering I barely went to class. Cutting classes hanging in the smoking area or girls bathroom was the life. I even was able to keep decent grades considering. New boyfriend and drivers license by 11th grade. Even though I was able to keep passing grades in my regular classes, I was still over weight and gym class was an absolute no go. So by mid year I realized there was no way I would graduate without the credits needed for physical education and I chose to drop out of school. My school district (Bedford Central School) paid for me to finish my computer sciences class and take a GED class at BOCES which I completed and passed in June 1991. I then chose to go directly to a 2 year business college, which again I dropped out of like an idiot with only 2 classes left for an Associates Degree in Business Management.

While still in college by high school boyfriend proposed, after about a year I realized I still wasn't ready for that kind of commitment. Louis, I also apologize for hurting you the way I did. Still living with my parents in that same house, I joined the Vista Volunteer Fire Department and became an Emergency Medical Technician. I loved it, but again I screwed up. I was the treasurer of the Woman's Auxiliary of the fire department and thought it would be a good idea to “borrow” a few thousand dollars. Well they had an audit and caught me before I was able to re-pay all of it. Thankfully my parents paid back what I had taken and they did not press charges against me; but they did make me resign from the fire department.

OK, now I am 18 and made a mess out of my life so far. I dated a few guys and ended up moving in with one of them. Now I look back, I probably just wanted out of that house.......
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